Growing up under the influence of the Chinese Nationalist Party (Kuomintang or KMT: Zhōngguó guómíndǎng中國國民黨)’s Chinese nationalism, I internalized a sense of shame about my family’s socioeconomic status, my parents’ lack of formal education, and their strong accents when speaking Chinese Mandarin. In an effort to fit in and succeed in school, I prioritized learning Mandarin and abandoned my mother tongue, Taiwanese-Hokkien (Táiwān mínnányǔ 臺灣閩南語), distancing myself from my cultural roots. Over time, I began to uncover the stories of struggle and resilience carried by my parents, grandparents, and community. Yet, it was not until I engaged more deeply with Taiwan’s history that I confronted a harsher truth: my people have not only been oppressed but have also been oppressors. While some Han people arrived on the island out of necessity and endured hardships under Japanese and KMT rule, they have also held power and privilege over Taiwan’s Indigenous Peoples since their arrival.

I worked as a teacher in Taiwan’s educational system for nearly a decade before transitioning to the United States for graduate studies. My passion for working with Indigenous students started during my college years, when I had various experiences in different Indigenous communities across Taiwan. I deeply enjoyed working with Indigenous children and was committed to helping them, believing I was contributing to “improving their situation.” However, I failed to recognize the stereotypes I held about Indigenous communities and did not critically understand the colonial impacts on Indigenous Peoples. Later, I came to understand that realities my students lived in and the ongoing discrimination in Taiwan are the result of centuries of settler colonialism.  

The journey of unpacking these truths has taken me beyond guilt and toward a deeper sense of responsibility to advocate for Indigenous Peoples. I recognized that working with Indigenous communities is not only a passion I hold dear, but also a process that reminds me of the power and privilege I hold with my Han-Taiwanese identity, and a necessity to constantly challenge the Han colonial narratives I once embodied. My journey of self-awareness, shaped by both educational experiences and personal reflection, has led me to confront the privilege and power I hold as a settler. My early experiences of abandoning my heritage language, and my current effort of reclaiming it, have deepened my understanding of the profound influence heritage language has on a person. This personal journey has not only shaped my understanding of the power dynamics inherent in settler colonialism but has also informed my research focus on the efforts of an Indigenous community to reclaim their language and culture.

I have​​ come to understand that the real solution to addressing the struggles of Indigenous Peoples goes beyond offering superficial “help.” It requires actively recognizing and dismantling colonial systems. My passion is driven by a commitment to support Indigenous communities in preserving and revitalizing their languages and cultures, not through imposition, but through collaboration and learning, while constantly challenging my own internalized narratives and privileges. To me, this work is about advocating for a future where Indigenous Peoples are empowered to reckon with their own past and sustain their cultural heritage. It is also a path I walk to transform guilt into meaningful action that drives for transformative change.